Broken: adjective

1. reduced to fragments; fragmented.

2. ruptured; torn; fractured.

3. not functioning properly; out of working order.

Broken: no longer part of the whole. Unable, incapable of being complete. Beyond repair.

Broken: forces outside of an object render it torn, threads of it’s being separated by violence.

Broken: as a result of over burden or neglect, an object fails to do what it was designed for.

I have been removed from the whole. Felt beyond repair—broken. Believed I would never, could never be complete. I’ve had people I love, and respect be at odds with where the Spirit stirred me and been violently pulled in two; Gay and Christian, but never both—broken. I have carried a weight that was never meant to be mine, hidden my deepest self from the world (including myself), and been cast out by those who were charged with the duty of my protection. Neglected—broken.

My experience of brokenness in its literal definition has used what first separated me from Christ to draw me closer to Him. “I was broken for you.” Takes on an entirely new meaning to my soul after experiencing my own spiritual destruction. I’ve been trampled on, pushed, bruised, mislabelled, and misrepresented, and so has Jesus.

He never, and I mean never, retaliated against his oppressors and abusers, but neither did he stay silent. His rebellion, after rising from his brokenness, was to deeply love and radically include. He did so regardless of the amount of faith those around him had, and that’s my mission. To deeply love and radically include regardless of a shared faith, ethnicity, orientation, or worldview. I will break the system with my brokenness. He was broken for me, and I was broken for them—they that do not yet see their value.

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3 thoughts on “Brokenness: LGBT Christian

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