This week, I was re-reading some old emails. They were sent to me by well-meaning conservative Christian friends after I publicly came out. A theme emerged that it important to address. I am not lost.
It’s painfully ironic that in their rush to tell me how confused by Satan I am and how I am leading others down the road of confusion they failed to enter into an actual conversation with me. Three and four-page letters carry almost mirror-image monologues from self-proclaimed “very intelligent” theologians.
In one sentence they congratulated me for my intelligence and in the next reminded me that they are smarter and wiser and more well read than I, and that it would behoove me to head their wisdom.
In the nearly four years since those original emails were sent, and those now former friends repeated their love for me, I’ve not heard from a single one. I am healthier emotionally, physically, and spiritually now. I owe this all to the integrity a group of individuals said I lacked back then (and probably still think I do now).
While on the topic of integrity, I learned a Peace River Bible Institute a phrase that has stuck with me. In Spiritual Formation class, we were taught that integrity is when the outside matches the inside and a person is whole. That is exactly what coming out is all about. The integrity called into question my hyper-conservatives is the very integrity that demanded I be open and honest.
Even more curious, I’ve known more LGBTQ+ Christians (or people who have renounced that title but still love Jesus) to come out of my tiny conservative Bible College than any I’ve met since. In my group of closest friends from my four years there, four out of five of us came out as LGBTQ+.
The tools we learned there, though not at all intended by the leadership to manifest in such a way, enabled us with the skills to discern God’s word for ourselves. We learned, had drilled into us, that context is key not only when interpreting scripture, but when applying it to our current culture.
There is no precedent for committed long term same-sex relationships historically at the time the Bible was written, there’s also no text for trans individuals, and no text for veganism (to pick something less “sexuality” based). But people still have strong opinions around all of those things and what scripture does or does not say.
What I know beyond a shadow of a doubt to be true is what Jesus said. He said that to be saved we need only to put our faith in him. Full stop. We need to stop making a laundry list of Jesus + this other random thing. Jesus preached a wholly inclusive faith, that’s the point of the feast parable.
All this rambling to say I’m still bisexual, I still love Jesus, and I still know it’s more than okay to be both those things.
If you need some resources to help you out on this journey or if someone you love is LGBTQ+ and you need some support visit the contact us page and I’ll point you in the most helpful direction.
Don’t let people steal your joy, your Jesus, or your value.